Being an only child is beautiful but hard at the same time. Being an only child raised by a single mother, it teaches you quite a lot. My mother and I have one of best relationships (the best on this earth), she is my rock.
At a young age, my mum lost it all and our life flipped from luxurious to “making ends meet.” It was at that time I learnt that some of the myths put on single-kids are not true. Here are some of my truths about being a single-child.
- Everytime I have told people that I am an only child, the response I’ve gotten is “You have it all, you must be a snob.” This is far from it. From a young age, I was told money doesn’t grow on trees and if you want something, you work hard for it. I remember my mum always giving me chores just to get my favourite doll. I hated that she did that, but now I understand that she was teaching me to work hard and earn it. Do other single-kids get everything? Yes they do, but it is dependent on the parents that they have.
- Maturity comes at an early age for us. My mum is always out to make ends meet, I became the home carer. Had to learn fast on my way around the house. Sometimes, I acted more like my mum’s sister than daughter. But this isn’t always good, sometimes our maturity gets the best of us. For instance, I started taking alcohol at 13, smoking at 14 and prefer dating men who are at least 5-8 years older. All these because I feel older than my age and always think “if they can, why can’t I?”
- Most single-kids are often loyal to their friends but unfortunately find it easy to let people go. We take friends as our family, the siblings we never had but once they play with our feelings, it becomes easier to boot them out because we are used to being alone anyway.
- We are not always anti-social, most of us are ambiverts. We love being wild and crazy but we are used to our personal spaces and mostly crave our alone time.
- We find a lot of faults in being single-kids that we never wish it on our own kids. Even in my sleep, if someone was to ask how many kids I want in life, I would say 4.
- We get lonely. I sometimes hate hearing my friends talk about their siblings because it is a constant reminder that I will never have that in life. Sometimes, it is the sibling connection and company that we desire.
- We are super protective. I would kill for my mum and I would die for her too. There’s no other way about it. Seeing my mum in pain is always an ultimate downfall for me. That is the same with the parents, they protect the only seed they put on this earth.
So, when people say “I wish I was an only child,” my response is always that it is fun but not at the same time. We are always reminded that we only have us in this world, no one to pull us through. When you are 2 or 4 kids, there is mostly a co-dependence, something we are not awarded with.
These have been my truths. Are you an only child, share some of yours below.